With your arms outstretched trying to take flight

"Brothers On A Hotel Bed"

You may tire of me as our December sun is setting because I'm not who I used to be
No longer easy on the eyes but these wrinkles masterfully disguise
The youthful boy below who turned your way and saw
Something he was not looking for: both a beginning and an end
But now he lives inside someone he does not recognize
When he catches his reflection on accident

On the back of a motor bike
With your arms outstretched trying to take flight
Leaving everything behind
But even at our swiftest speed we couldn't break from the concrete
In the city where we still reside.
And I have learned that even landlocked lovers yearn for the sea like navy men
Cause now we say goodnight from our own separate sides
Like brothers on a hotel bed
Like brothers on a hotel bed
Like brothers on a hotel bed
Like brothers on a hotel bed

Those happen to be the lyrics to a very beautiful song called Brothers on a Hotel Bed by Death Cab For Cutie. You can listen to it here.

For me, this is what I feel like a lot of the time.
Its about an escape, and I have been trying to escape for years.  In some ways its to avoid pain and in other ways to reach new levels.

The only problem is I am the classic Pisces. I am always swimming against myself.  So what is the solution?
Well, I have no idea.

However I do know the first step in the right direction: I have to own up to my fears.

This is difficult for one simple reason. I am afraid of damn near everything.
Change and stagnation,
The air and deep water,
Love and Loneliness.
To name a few.

Yeah. I'm like a walking, talking contradiction.  But I am trying to be my own person. Try new things, let go of old things.

We'll see how that goes huh?