Oh dear

I sent in my Freshmen Application to the University of Washington about 10 minutes ago.

Now I am scared shitless.

Yeah, I have heard it from my friends and my family and both of my councellors that I have nothing to worry about.  Oh yes I do.  How can I honestly stack up when the people I know who got in are fricken geniuses like Jessica, Hillary or Cam?  Yeah, uh I can't.

I'm not looking forward to getting that damned letter saying 'sorry, but you suck. go to a trade school you idiot.' Worst of all, I have no idea when it is going to come, so untill that lovely bit of dissappointment graces my mailbox I get to freak out every time the mailman comes by.

Next for me is Western.  I feel a bit more confident about getting in but I'm not entirely sure if I want to even go to a university next year.  A Jr. College would be very helpful for my sanity but lets not forget that it would also be feeding that sick monster inside of me that devalues everything I do. Even though the normal side knows that this is an equally good path to go down That thing eats away at my expectations rubbing it in that I'm not good enough. Or something.


Uhhg. I annoy myself.